Back on January 13th, I was struggling with too many choices. One resolved itself simply: Disney trip cancelled for lack of market share. Oh. Well. The boy will never know what he’s missing.
The other, whether to continue one affiliation (let’s call this one A) at the risk of giving the impression of a conflict of interest with another (heretofore referred to as L) has not been so easily resolved. I discussed it with two people, both of whom I trust both personally and professionally for their candor and knowledge of the business of literature and publishing. One suggested that I confront L by saying my work with A is on a per-manuscript basis, invaluable experience that would in the end benefit me all around, including in my work with L, and could I not sign a confidentiality agreement with L stating that I would not transfer information from L to A in any situation. The other person I spoke to said, basically, “who’s to know? There will be no harm done if you do both.”
The funny thing is, I hear them both, but will likely listen to neither. I am, sadly, incapable of deception, honest to a flaw. If you know me, you know me. And besides, the few times I’ve attempted anything “sneaky” in my life, I’m always caught, regardless of how good my rationale has been to do it. I am a rule follower. The joke at my house for years has been that I am “the fish in the pot” to my partner’s “cat in the hat.” The one time I didn’t stop for a full three seconds at a 4-way stop sign in a nearly tenantless neighborhood, it turned out to be tenanted by a motorcycle cop hiding behind a tree. So I just don’t even try to misrepresent myself. Though I am hyperbolic, in a Holden Caulfield sort of way.
I also am not a button pusher. It’s taking me quite some time to learn all the bells and whistles on wordpress, in fact, because I am doing it very carefully. I still can’t quite figure out why my links don’t show up the way I want them to. But I will understand after I read all the advice pages. My new Sony Cybershot is waiting for me to finish reading the entire instruction manual. I am cautious. I wouldn’t say I’m afraid of conflict, but if there is a way around it, I give it a decent shot. Having said that, I won’t confront L with my colleague’s suggestions; what if they say NO, and then no longer trust me?
So as it stands now, I’m going to take a hiatus from A so that I can do L. I believe that A will be around in six months and I’ll be even more qualified to do A after my experience with L. I’ll watch it for a while and then determine my next move.